Monday Musings: Emojis, Leap Day, and Oscars Night

Dear Dreams, If you don't stop being so vivid, realistic, and wedding related, I'm going to get really confused.

Dear Newport News, Now that you have a Mellow Mushroom, you've risen about 10 points in my book! I have a feeling we'll be seeing you more often!

Dear Leap Day, The last time you came around, I felt the need to do something epic. Unfortunately, this year, my to do list is way too long. It's the week of the Crystal Clear Event after all.

Dear Emojis, Could you come with captions? I can't even tell what some of those faces are supposed to be.
Also... why is there no taco emoji? And what about yoga? I mean... there are 7 different train emojis.... something seems lopsided here.


And because Oscars night is the best for fashion:

Only Cate Blanchett could pull off this gown without looking like a mermaid. I was really surprised that I loved it.

The LA Times described Heidi Klum's dress as a bridemaid's gone bad dress and I couldn't agree more. It's simultaneously dowdy and skanky. And it really does look like a wedding in an action movie where the bridesmaid has to run around and save the day really fast before the ceremony and she gets one of her sleeves ripped off.

Does anyone else feel bad for guys on Oscars night? It's one of the biggest fashion nights of the year, and yet I want to wrinkle my nose whenever anyone deviates from the classic James Bond type looks. No red piping, no teal (did you mistake that for navy in a dark dressing room?), and for goodness sake... do not roll up your pant legs. It is not flooding.


Ryan Quote of the Week:
I don't want to jump into the tan abyss.