Dear Car Companies, There's no need to market to me on Instagram. While your images certainly stand out in my feed of lace wedding dresses, fresh flowers, and Kate Spade office supplies, I promise that your marketing is 0% effective.
Dear Purple Shoes, How am I supposed to live without you? How am I supposed to carry on?
Dear Bathroom Floor, Don't you ever touch another one of my toothbrushes ever again!
Dear Little Yellow House, If only you had a fireplace...
Dear Sharpie Pens, I never want to use a normal pen again. But I need to buy thicker paper.
Dear Three Year Old Business Cards, I'm so glad I hung onto all 250+ of you, because you really came in handy when we were touching up our bathroom trim.
And a note for two very animate objects...
Dear Mom & Dad, Welcome to the 21st century of texting and smart phones. You have no idea how excited I am about this! I'm going to interrupt you at work so much less now!
Ryan Quote of the Week: If your pants were a person they'd be in a nursing home.
Shameless Plug of the Week: Brides & Grooms, if you haven't gotten your tickets for Mayapalooza and the Crystal Clear Vision Event, put March 5 on your calendar and buy your tickets today!