Pages from the Sequel: I Love You

As anyone who's ever read a love story knows, the wedding is usually the last chapter of the book. But in a real love story, there's so much more to be told. So much happens in the happily ever after. And that’s what the sequel is for: to tell the story of two people as husband and wife as they live and grow together. So here are pages from our sequel.

I LOVE YOU

We stood at the top of the stairs together. He held his milk cup tightly in the crook of his arm. He had slept later than usual and his nose was still crusty. I swung open the baby gate. He held out his milk to me and then reached for me to hold him. He's been wanting me to carry him up and down the stairs a lot lately. Maybe to conserve his energy for play time. I scooped him up, kissed his cheek, and told him that I love him.

And then he said it.

“eye-la-oo.”

It might have sounded like baby babble to anyone else, but I knew what he was saying. And my heart burst into a thousand glittery fireworks.

Darcy’s not really putting words together yet. In fact, he's barely talking. He’s got the usual: Mama, Daddy, Nana, no. But he won’t say night-night or bye-bye. I can’t get him to verbally say the word ‘please’ when he signs it. He mostly nods instead of saying yes.

But somehow he says a couple combo words. Maybe it’s because they're basically two syllable words in our house: “Oh no!” and “Oh my!”

And now we can add I love you.

Pages from the Sequel:
Return from Jamaica
The Little Blue House
The Ugly Yellow House
The Flea Episode
The Bathroom Leak
The Dinner Disaster
Baby on Board
The Story of Lucy
The Vanishing Bread
Midnight Dance with Darcy
Nighttime Feedings
Our David & Goliath Moment
Beach Day
I Love You

Pages from the Sequel: Beach Day

As anyone who's ever read a love story knows, the wedding is usually the last chapter of the book. But in a real love story, there's so much more to be told. So much happens in the happily ever after. And that’s what the sequel is for: to tell the story of two people as husband and wife as they live and grow together. So here are pages from our sequel.

BEACH DAY

We walked down to the water's edge and lowered him to the ground. His toes curled against the densely packed sand, and he looked down at the ocean foam, the last bubbly traces of the receded wave. His chubby feet pressed deeper into the wet sand until his toes disappeared. Daddy's hand held his own tightly and securely. He poked a finger of his other hand into his mouth, not even noticing the small grains of sand that were stuck to it. His eyes were firmly on the ocean as he tried to figure out this new place.

And then suddenly, a wave crested and a wall of foaming water advanced. He followed it with his eyes as it splashed against his leg. He worked to maintain his balance. And then as quickly as it had come, the water began to withdraw. His eyebrows knit together. This was a puzzling place indeed. But he did not dislike it. Another wave came and then a third. He lost interest in the waves, the foam, the sand. He lifted his arms for Mama and as always, she came running.

Pages from the Sequel:
Return from Jamaica
The Little Blue House
The Ugly Yellow House
The Flea Episode
The Bathroom Leak
The Dinner Disaster
Baby on Board
The Story of Lucy
The Vanishing Bread
Midnight Dance with Darcy
Nighttime Feedings
Our David & Goliath Moment
Beach Day
I Love You

Pages from the Sequel: Our David & Goliath Moment

As anyone who's ever read a love story knows, the wedding is usually the last chapter of the book. But in a real love story, there's so much more to be told. So much happens in the happily ever after. And that’s what the sequel is for: to tell the story of two people as husband and wife as they live and grow together. So here are pages from our sequel.

OUR DAVID AND GOLIATH MOMENT

Ryan and I stared at each other in disbelief. We stood only a few feet apart in our kitchen, a single ice cube on the tile floor in between us.

Dinner that night had started just like normal. I had buckled Darcy into his highchair so I would have two free hands to get our food on the table. After placing his bowl of pumpkin oatmeal just out of reach on the table, I knew I had less than a minute to put our tacos together and get back to the table before he would start reminding us in his own excited way that it was time to eat.

I set two plates on the island and topped each one with taco shells while Ryan dropped ice cubes in his glass. In our hurry, his arm looped through mine like an old fashioned wedding toast. I moved my arm, adding shredded cheese to my taco shell, before crossing to the stove to scoop on the meat. As I turned back to finish the tacos off with tomatoes and lettuce, Ryan picked up a stray ice cube that had fallen to the floor, a common occurrence for our overly-enthusiastic ice machine. He tossed the ice cube softball-pitching-style at the sink just as I moved perfectly in the way, landing the ice cube right between my eyes, David and Goliath style.

Pages from the Sequel:
Return from Jamaica
The Little Blue House
The Ugly Yellow House
The Flea Episode
The Bathroom Leak
The Dinner Disaster
Baby on Board
The Story of Lucy
The Vanishing Bread
Midnight Dance with Darcy
Nighttime Feedings
Our David & Goliath Moment
Beach Day
I Love You

Pages from the Sequel: Nighttime Feedings

As anyone who's ever read a love story knows, the wedding is usually the last chapter of the book. But in a real love story, there's so much more to be told. So much happens in the happily ever after. And that’s what the sequel is for: to tell the story of two people as husband and wife as they live and grow together. So here are pages from our sequel.

NIGHTTIME FEEDINGS

I held Darcy’s tiny little hand, his fingers wrapped around my thumb. His head slowly rolled away from me in the crook of my elbow as sleep overcame him.

I brought him up to my shoulder to burp and he snuggled in tight. I held him close, his sleeping body completely relaxed against my chest. His face tucked in to the side of my neck. His legs bent against my belly. His tiny fingers opening and closing against my skin. I wrapped my arms a little tighter and tried to breathe in the smell of him. To breathe in this moment in the darkness and somehow lock it in my memory. 

Today my baby slept past 5 am. For the second time. 

I held him longer than usual. Just in case it was the last time. I could already see a dim glow through the curtain. It was 6:20 now and the sun would soon be up. As the light of my phone illuminated his face, his body wiggled. But I had to get these thoughts down. I had to remember this moment. Because in a few minutes he would be back in his bed and I would be back in mine. As I fell asleep again these thoughts would dissipate, and I wouldn't quite be able to remember them in the morning.

And so I sat, as if something glued me to the chair. Letting these thoughts fill the silence. I bent down to rest my chin on his head, and Darcy breathed a little triple breath that he often does while deep in sleep.

Finally I shifted him in my arms and stood up. I kissed his soft little check and whispered "Mama's so proud of you sweet boy."

And I was. So proud that he was growing and learning to sleep well. And thankful that I feel well rested every day, because I know there are lots of mamas who don’t. But my heart still ached a little. Because I knew that as he grew and developed, I would be missing out on something that I loved. And this was just the first of many times I would feel this way.

Just as many others were getting up to start their day, I crept back to my bed and pulled the covers up tight for another hour of sleep. Hoping it wouldn't be the last time I had to get up during the night for Darcy. Wanting to keep him little and somehow watch him grow up at the same time.

I have so many favorite moments with Darcy already. His smiles. His expressive eyebrows. His single excited laugh when we bounce him on our laps. But the way he snuggles against me when sleep overtakes him is one of my most precious moments. 

Because I know they'll soon be gone. 

Pages from the Sequel:
Return from Jamaica
The Little Blue House
The Ugly Yellow House
The Flea Episode
The Bathroom Leak
The Dinner Disaster
Baby on Board
The Story of Lucy
The Vanishing Bread
Midnight Dance with Darcy
Nighttime Feedings
Our David & Goliath Moment
Beach Day
I Love You

Pages from the Sequel: My Midnight Dance with Darcy

As anyone who's ever read a love story knows, the wedding is usually the last chapter of the book. But in a real love story, there's so much more to be told. So much happens in the happily ever after. And that’s what the sequel is for: to tell the story of two people as husband and wife as they live and grow together. So here are pages from our sequel.

MY MIDNIGHT DANCE WITH DARCY

Soft music played as we swayed around the room together. One hand supporting his neck and the other under his back. White noise played the foundational notes to the lullaby and soft blue rays from the nightlight kept the room from total blackness. In the darkness, I could see his eyelids drooping as I snuggled him close and rocked him to sleep in my arms. 

It was one night in the weeks of night wakings.

Through my tiredness, I reminded myself that soon our baby would be falling asleep on his own. One day he wouldn’t need a lullaby. And one day he would even tuck himself in. These nights seemed long, but I knew their time was very short and I would soon miss our midnight dances.

As I swayed with him in the dark, I pictured us decades in the future, swaying again to a very different dance. One hand resting on his back, big and strong. The other stretching up to reach his neck. Maybe he would be wearing a dark fitted suit. Maybe I’d be in a long purple gown. On that day, will I think back on dozens of nights like this one? When it was just him and me? When he depended on me for everything? 

During that dance, his arms will be the ones supporting me. I will be the one closing my eyes, resting my head against his shoulder. And then I will look across the room and meet the eyes of the kind, beautiful woman that won his heart. The one that he would be starting a life with… just the two of them, depending on each other, supporting each other, loving each other.

In the dark of that quiet night, I looked down at his sleepy eyelids and pulled him just a bit closer as tears came to my eyes. Then I kissed his little forehead and laid him in the crib. And I whispered to my sweet little Darcy, “I’ll always be the one who loved you first.”

Pages from the Sequel:
Return from Jamaica
The Little Blue House
The Ugly Yellow House
The Flea Episode
The Bathroom Leak
The Dinner Disaster
Baby on Board
The Story of Lucy
The Vanishing Bread
Midnight Dance with Darcy
Nighttime Feedings
Our David & Goliath Moment
Beach Day
I Love You

Pages from the Sequel: The Vanishing Bread

As anyone who's ever read a love story knows, the wedding is usually the last chapter of the book. But in a real love story, there's so much more to be told. So much happens in the happily ever after. And that’s what the sequel is for: to tell the story of two people as husband and wife as they live and grow together. So here are pages from our sequel.

THE VANISHING BREAD

The smell of cooked bacon was already fading from the kitchen when Ryan asked me to make his grilled cheese and bacon sandwich. After putting my dinner plate in the sink, I opened the door to the pantry and reached for the bread. But it wasn’t there.

“I don’t see the bread, Ryan.”

“Are we out?” he asked, looking up from the fish tank.

“No. I had toast this morning and we had half of a loaf left.”

Ryan smirked. “Did the pregnant lady put the bread somewhere weird?”

It was like he had been waiting for this very moment. Several times over the last few months I had caught myself opening the fridge or pantry or even the trash can to put an item where it didn’t belong. But a quick glance over the kitchen didn’t reveal the loaf of bread. It wasn’t on a different pantry shelf. It wasn’t inside the fridge or in the trash can. Ryan checked the cabinets, under the sink, and even inside the dishwasher. And then he expanded his search.

As he went upstairs to check our room, which is where I had gone to finish getting ready after eating my toast, I knew he wasn’t going to find the bread. There was no way that I had set a loaf of bread down in our bedroom. We would have found it earlier in the day.

Sure enough, a few minutes later, he was back downstairs and checking the kitchen cabinets again.

“You’re just going to have to go to the store and buy another loaf,” I told him.

But Ryan was invested in the search now. He was determined to find it and post my hilarious mistake on Instagram. Besides if he didn’t find it, he reminded me, it would be like that time we got a cookie tin down from the top of the fridge and discovered 6 month old moldy Valentine’s Day cookies inside. And I sure didn’t like the idea of finding a super moldy loaf of bread somewhere in a few weeks.

Finally, Ryan decided to empty the pantry. After he cleared through the plastic tubs and stacks of cloth grocery bags that cover the floor of our little pantry, he discovered the bread. Not in an exciting and humorous spot like he had hoped. It had merely fallen off of the shelf.

I smiled in triumph. My brain was apparently still intact.

Pages from the Sequel:
Return from Jamaica
The Little Blue House
The Ugly Yellow House
The Flea Episode
The Bathroom Leak
The Dinner Disaster
Baby on Board
The Story of Lucy
The Vanishing Bread
Midnight Dance with Darcy
Nighttime Feedings
Our David & Goliath Moment
Beach Day
I Love You