Pages from the Sequel: Nighttime Feedings

As anyone who's ever read a love story knows, the wedding is usually the last chapter of the book. But in a real love story, there's so much more to be told. So much happens in the happily ever after. And that’s what the sequel is for: to tell the story of two people as husband and wife as they live and grow together. So here are pages from our sequel.

NIGHTTIME FEEDINGS

I held Darcy’s tiny little hand, his fingers wrapped around my thumb. His head slowly rolled away from me in the crook of my elbow as sleep overcame him.

I brought him up to my shoulder to burp and he snuggled in tight. I held him close, his sleeping body completely relaxed against my chest. His face tucked in to the side of my neck. His legs bent against my belly. His tiny fingers opening and closing against my skin. I wrapped my arms a little tighter and tried to breathe in the smell of him. To breathe in this moment in the darkness and somehow lock it in my memory. 

Today my baby slept past 5 am. For the second time. 

I held him longer than usual. Just in case it was the last time. I could already see a dim glow through the curtain. It was 6:20 now and the sun would soon be up. As the light of my phone illuminated his face, his body wiggled. But I had to get these thoughts down. I had to remember this moment. Because in a few minutes he would be back in his bed and I would be back in mine. As I fell asleep again these thoughts would dissipate, and I wouldn't quite be able to remember them in the morning.

And so I sat, as if something glued me to the chair. Letting these thoughts fill the silence. I bent down to rest my chin on his head, and Darcy breathed a little triple breath that he often does while deep in sleep.

Finally I shifted him in my arms and stood up. I kissed his soft little check and whispered "Mama's so proud of you sweet boy."

And I was. So proud that he was growing and learning to sleep well. And thankful that I feel well rested every day, because I know there are lots of mamas who don’t. But my heart still ached a little. Because I knew that as he grew and developed, I would be missing out on something that I loved. And this was just the first of many times I would feel this way.

Just as many others were getting up to start their day, I crept back to my bed and pulled the covers up tight for another hour of sleep. Hoping it wouldn't be the last time I had to get up during the night for Darcy. Wanting to keep him little and somehow watch him grow up at the same time.

I have so many favorite moments with Darcy already. His smiles. His expressive eyebrows. His single excited laugh when we bounce him on our laps. But the way he snuggles against me when sleep overtakes him is one of my most precious moments. 

Because I know they'll soon be gone. 

 

Pages from the Sequel:
Return from Jamaica
The Little Blue House
The Ugly Yellow House
The Flea Episode
The Bathroom Leak
The Dinner Disaster
Baby on Board
The Story of Lucy
The Vanishing Bread
Midnight Dance with Darcy
Nighttime Feedings
Our David & Goliath Moment
Beach Day
I Love You